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Another piece of motivation that I absolutely love.
It’s nice to remind yourself why you push yourself to the limits; and that there is a massive fucking pay off if you do.

 

I’ve been training long enough now to know my limits… Knowing those boundaries and how far your body can be pushed is a great thing, but knowing when your mind is syking you out of what you need to do to push those boundaries is what makes a good athlete a great one.
You will not always win the battle over your mind; it’s strong and after many years of getting it’s own way – your subconscious is not used to piping down and playing second fiddle to the way you desire to be… So that’s when you need to dig deep and pull out a little extra.

This morning I had a particularly gruelling workout that I’ve designed not to burn calories, not to shape my physique a certain way, but mostly to push me further than I thought possible each and every time I set out to begin it. I wake up in anticipation and dread in equal levels; I so badly want to smash through it but I know how much physical pain I need to put myself through to get to the other side…

So that’s when I need a little extrinsic motivation; playlists, an extra 5 minute warm up to get myself in the zone, but this morning – I watched this video (again – it’s a favourite) and remembered EXACTLY why I do what I do and I hope that it gives you that clarity and determination that it brings me…

I decided to take a step back from blogging about Health and Fitness stuff for an entry and let you know a little more about me. No better way to do that then with one of those old Myspace Quizzes you used to post in a bulletin… I found one saved on my computer. Updating the answers was incredibly funny.
Anyway, here goes…

[Wallet]
Black; faux leather and large enough to fit my passport, which is, annoyingly, my only form of I.D seeing as though I don’t drive.
[Toothbrush]
It’s Chanel. No, I’m fucking kidding. It’s a toothbrush, medium bristles, purple in colour.


[Jewelry worn daily]
My engagement ring, and the Our Lady necklace I bought in this amazing Mexican store in Los Angeles.

[Doona Cover]
All white. Egyptian cotton. Very little excites me more than the concept of fresh linen.

[Facewash]
I gravitate towards L’Oreal products at the moment and they serve me well. Which is thankful as they aren’t extraordinarily expensive and I go through them quite quickly.

[Coffee cup]
I hardly drink coffee anywhere else but my house these days, so it’s usually in the same style latte glass that fits under the espresso machine. That sounds wanky, but seriously, I had to buy special cups to fit underneath it.

[Sunglasses]
Ray Ban Wayfarers. They are by far by favourite shape and they are timeless.

[Underwear]
I love cotton underwear. Mostly because it’s fucking comfortable. But I only wear black underwear and it always has some form of lace. It’s entirely possible to be sexy and comfortable at the same time. Even if beige underpants were the most comfortable thing in the world; I’d feel uncomfortable knowing there’s a slight chance I’d get hit by a bus and people would find out I wore beige underwear.

[Shoes]
I love heels as much as the next girl. But lately I’m all about flat shoes. I train too often to be able to justify wearing heels all day. It isn’t good for your feet and you run the risk of spraining your ankle which scares me too much.

[Favourite shirt]
I seriously am in love with my boy’s Run DMC singlet. It’s falling apart it’s that old, and it’s so big on him so I practically swim in it, but it’s the ultimate comfort tank.

[Favourite pants]
My black super tight Stella McCartney pants, they are semi high waisted with transparent mesh panels down the side.

[Favourite album]
I’m having a reunion with Lil Wayne’s Tha Carter III at the moment. I’m also loving Computers and Blues by The Streets and of course, Adele’s 21.

[Tattoos]
Two. One to many I think.

[Piercings]
Ears.

[What you are wearing now:]

A black tank top, my black Bonds hoodie and some grey short shorts, haha. I got out of bed and threw my hoodie on then came to my computer to study. However, I got distracted.

[Hair]
In a bun. I rarely wear it out when I’m at home.

[Do you like candles]
Love. Especially scented… I have an adorable one next to my bed at the moment that was a gift with purchase from Lorna Jane… It smells divine.

[Do you believe in love]
Yes. How could you not? Love fuels absolutely everything around us. Even war. It’s present in so many more senses than Hallmark cards would have you believe.

[Do you believe in soul mates]
It’s a disgustingly general term but yes, in some way or another I think there’s people out there that just go together.

[Do you believe in love at first sight]
At first sight it’s still lust. But it builds if it’s right.

[What do you want done with your body when you die]
Holy morbid… Cremation. Burial makes me feel all sorts of uncomfortable.

[How many songs do you have on your computer?]
11,328 in iTunes.

[Look out your window…tell me what you see]
Daylight, rain, a pool and a tennis court.

[If you could have any animal for a pet?]
A pick pocketing monkey or bust… I’m not a pet person.



[ When was the last time you … ]
[Smiled?]

A few minutes ago. I can’t remember what it was about though.

[Laughed?]
See above.

[Danced?]
Probably by myself, probably in my bedroom… I’m losing the plot.

[Had a nightmare?]
I was having them frequently when we first moved into our new apartment, but they stopped a while ago and hopefully for good.

[Last movie you Watched]
Umm… I don’t know, I’ve been watching a lot of South Park and The Boondocks over the past day or two though.

[Last thing you had to drink?]
Double macchiato. Still sippin’.

[Last thing you had to eat]
Oats with cinnamon prepared with half water and half non fat milk. Sounds bland, tastes so good.


[ Fashion ]
[Do you wear a watch?]
Daily. I have a few that I adore and wear for special occasions but my black Polar FT7 Heart rate monitor rarely escapes my wrist.

[How many coats and jackets do you own?]
Not enough. But a few; blazers, a leather jacket, a fur (It was second hand, which I believe is everyone’s excuse for buying fur and it not being entirely morally reprehensible). I want an incredible winter coat.

[Favourite pants color?]
Black



[ Music/TV/Books ]
[Favourite band ever?]
Ever? Oh I don’t know. I really can’t answer this.

[Do you find any musicians good-looking?]
That’s broad. But usually no, I don’t gravitate towards musicians because I don’t watch music videos and rarely know what they look like. Sure there are some that are incredibly attractive though.

[Favourite movie?]
There’s so many, of all time it might be Drop Dead Fred. Purely for the memories it brings.


[Favourite TV show?]
I’m inclined to say Weeds. It is fantastic. But I love tv series (when you get the dvd box set and don’t have to watch annoying advertisements) and I have so many favourites.

[Favourite book?]
One Day – David Nicholls. Hands down, and I’m so bummed they are filming it for a movie, especially considering they cast Anne Hathaway and I find her repulsive.

[ General Questions ]
[What do you prefer, a sunny or rainy day?]
Sunny; but not too hot. A lovely sunny London-in-May day.

[Do you consider yourself lucky?]
I think you get what you work for and luck is a bit of a fools notion.

[Choose one word to describe how you feel most often]
Blessed.

[Is there more than one zipper in your pants?]

No.

[Do you have a favourite brand of hair dye?]
I’m liking the new Mousse range by Schwarzkopf. 3.0 – chocolate.



[Favourites]
[Color]
I like black, white, greys, greens and purples the most.

[Day]
Sunday. No question.

[Month]
I don’t really have a favourite month. May’s nice, it’s my birthday month.

[Food]
Peanut butter and carbs… clearly the devils work.

[Season]
Summer.

[Drink]
Water. Still or sparkling.

[Store]
Oxford Street Topshop is mind blowing. But Priceline probably my most frequented in Australia. I’m obsessed with buying make up and lotions I don’t really need.

[Flower]
I love white roses the most.

This morning I read an entry over at RunEatRepeat about the ways you can consume calories without noticing (i.e snacking at the fridge, trying someone elses food, having a corner of a biscuit rather than a full one). I am a MASSIVE culprit of this and have noticed it lately but didn’t quite realise that it was something a whole lot of us were guilty of.

These are my worst habits:

– I ‘try’ everything I am cooking. If I’m throwing cheese into my meals, I’ll have a little nibble. If I’m making sweet potato fries, I open the oven door to check them and eat a few. I end up eating more than I dish out on my plate this way and therefore I sneak in a whole shitload of calories I’m not accounting for.

– Let’s be honest, the Boy isn’t as healthy as I am and in turn I almost relish being able to cook him deliciously fatty meals that I cannot even look at without getting thicker around the thighs… But I always have a bite. Or two. – We have biscuits at work, lots of them, and they are in a “help yourself” communal little jar by the fridge. I haven’t been doing this for a while now but I used to grab one out and eat a corner and throw the rest in the bin. I’d even notice myself doing this a few times a day, not only is it incredibly wasteful but I am probably consuming a whole cookie in the space of a day anyway.

– When I get home from work it’s like my wind down time. I have been so good all day and not snacked or eaten badly, but the second I sit back and relax at home I throw my hands up to the Boy’s junk food shelf of the pantry and end up grabbing a handful of corn chips or something equally fatty and grosse that I shouldn’t eat. I treat it like a reward, my ass treats it for exactly what it is – extra calories/extra weight.

– Weekends. I seem to think the weekends are a Diet Free zone. I don’t know what it is but suddenly Friday at 5.30pm clicks over and I suddenly stop wanting to eat salads and be responsible for anything; work/nutrition/gym… All I want is a slice of pizza and a beer. And to be fair I don’t even like beer. I think I just like shirking responsibility.

– Beer. Alcohol in general. I don’t like it, I don’t like the taste of it and I don’t like the loss of control that it brings; yes I’ve become a control freak. Whatever. I probably only drink once every month or two but still… it’s not really my thing and I think it’s gotta go. I especially don’t like that it’s empty calories and I’d much prefer a piece of toast slathered in PB&Jam than a drink or two so no more of this rubbish, thank you!

Now that I’ve listed them and announced them to the world of the internet, I can learn to let them go.

As of today I am vowing to drastically reduce these habits to next to nothing. To make a solid effort to say No to myself. I really cannot continue to be so diligent about counting calories and eating healthy if I am going to reverse all my good efforts by being a dirty little snacker. It’s not ever going to stop all together, and I can’t imagine being able to ever exert the amount of self control it would require to banish all these habits but if I were to limit them drastically I think I’d limit my calorie intake by 200-300 calories a day. So let’s see how I go. I’ll report back over the following weeks. Fingers crossed.

I have however noticed a difference since quitting fizzy diet drinks… which I have been meaning to write about and I promise to do that soon too.

Enough about me; what are your bad food habits? Do you have a calorie black hole as well???

Diet Coke

I’d like to begin with an apology… if you clicked onto a link for this entry thinking that you were going to find out about some dirty secret about my scandolous love affair with Charlie Sheen’s best mate Cocaine… you will be let down.

This is merely my public admission of guilt.  I have the dirtiest habit someone who claims to be a health nut can possibly have; I am addicted to diet soft drink. I’d say I have on average 2-3 cans a day. It’s fucked, I know, don’t lecture me (I can hear you thinking it!) and it has to stop.

So as this morning I’m kicking the coke; and all other fizzy substances. It’s going, going, gone. I have allowed myself to have a small serving of sparkling mineral water every few days and even then I want to ween off this (I’m still under a bit of rock about this – does sparkling water have bad effects on you? Does it cause bloating?).

I’d like to say it’s purely for health reasons that I have come to the conclusion that this habit needs to come to it’s conclusion, but I’d be lying. Whilst I am greatly concerned about the things this gunk is doing to my body, I think I’m more concerned about what it does to my tummy. Even at my most physically fit I constantly noticed a slight bloating that held me back from having an entirely flat stomach… and no one wants to spend a great deal of time in the gym and be meticulous about their eating habits only to spoil this on soft drink.

It’s never really occured to me until now that this could very well be the cause of my little tummy, I’ve always (as a fat kid) drank alot of regular coke and soft drinks and as I lost weight I merely substituted that with diet soft drink. Recently I’ve taken to using Nativa or Stevia sugars instead of Equal as I know the dangers of diet sweeteners but I have clung desperately to my Diet Coke and gone the way of the ignorant, turning blissfully blind eyes to the habit.

Now; I’m going to continue to report back on how I am going with this and the effects it has on my physical appearance. Recently, I quit smokingand have had an insane amount of success with that; however I feel this is going to be harder.

I always agreed with myself that, with smoking, on a special occassion when I’m having a drink which is once every month or two I could, if I wanted to, have no more than 3 cigarettes (this is a great compromise considering that I used to smoke almost a pack a day at some points and was a smoker for almost 13 years) so I have allowed myself a can a week as I don’t think that will interfere with my findings and I don’t want to say that I absolutely can’t have it… I find when you allow yourself things you are trying to expel, eventually when you see the benefits – you kick the habit naturally by choice.

My goal with this is to feel better and to notice a physical change in tone and shape… I’d love to know what you think and what your bad habits are. Once I get through this we may need to start to talk about my unhealthy obsession with peanut butter…

Mornings are a funny, funny thing.

As a teenager I avoided them as if they were some form of disease riddled enemy. As a child you couldn’t wait to start your day getting up before the crack of dawn so excited about the day that I’m sure our parents assumed we were in fact on some form of crack.

Nowadays, I’m in between the two. I’m up early, usually 5am, but I’m not as excited about the days as you were when you were a kid.

Possibly because when you were a junior, you spend your youth believing that you could do anything with that day ahead – become a lawyer, a fireman (or woman), an actress, take over the world… but as an adult you realise you’re up early to fit in gym before work or to pay bills and organise your own lunches. The possibilities are not so exciting. And the weekends are filled with divine excitement over the fact that you may in fact get to sleep in twice.  

So how do you do it? How do you drag your ass out of bed?

I’ve learnt that it’s not easy and it’s not something you do because you want to but because you have to. It’s been a trying process over the years, I used to be the type that would arise mere moments before I absolutely had to leave my apartment to get to work, or more often than not – moments after and would be late for absolutely everything.

Time management is key. I find that keeping every miniscule detail of my day mapped out in my trusty day planner is the only way to ensure everything runs like clock work. But there are a few cheats that help make getting up at 5am bareable so I thought i’d share:

  1. Double shot macchiatos. I’m fortunate enough to own an espresso machine. They aren’t expensive, and they aren’t a luxury – I consider this material possession a god damn necessity. Get onto it. A strong coffee in the morning helps focus and if it’s a tasty strong coffee (not some awful instant mix) it’s a great way to start your day.
  2. Cold eye mask. I literally keep mine in the fridge and every morning I put it on for a couple of minutes whilst I’m waiting on the espresso machine to kick start. It reduces puffiness but the extremely cool sensation helps focus your mind and wake up your sleepy brain.
  3. L’Oreal Caffeine eye roll on – what the cool eye mask does not annihilate in the way of puffiness, this will. Looking tired only makes you feel it more. By this point you should be relatively awake.

 

Making sure that you have something fun to do whilst you’re enduring your mundane morning tasks makes it far more bareable… I watch repeats of Rachel Zoe Project or Gossip Girl when I put on my make up and clothes for the day. I go to the gym 3 mornings a week and allow myself an extra hour to sleep in when it’s not a ‘gym’ morning; after a while it seems like the days off are a treat rather than making the gym mornings feel like a punish.

But most of all, it simply comes down to optimism. No one wants to get up in the morning if they aren’t able to put a good light or a spin on what the day entails, so learn to cherish your weekends… spoil yourself with little treats for doing well (ie: watching shitty television whilst your getting ready because you aren’t rushed) and if you’re getting up every morning continuously hating your job and your daily tasks for a prolonged period of time, then quit what you’re doing… Nothing is worse than staying in something you hate and progressing in life only comes when you’re happy. Get happy.

If all else fails, start taking crack. I hear it’s fucking wonderful 🙂

So I’d only been running again for maybe 3-4 sessions before I retained yet another injury. This time to my knee cartilage.

I’ve just returned from the doctors who has ordered x-rays and MRI’s and told me to brace myself for the fact that I may not actually ever be able to run again.

Years ago I sustained quite severe damage to my cartilage in both knees and was told a similar story about having to undergo reconstruction or to stop playing competitive sports. This was at the peak in my basketball career and needless to say was the reason I quit and the reason that my fitness slipped away in the first place.

I’m determined not to give in so easily this time but as it stands currently I cannot walk properly or support myself with my right leg and I’m failing to find that proverbial silver lining on this dark cloud. The past few months especially I have dedicated my time and energy to my training. I’ve put my heart and soul into it and given up things I enjoyed for the benefit of my fitness and for my marathon training. I gave up smoking, I most recently gave up drinking and I gave up many a morning sleep in to lace my shoes at 5am and run until my frozen limbs warmed amongst the brisk pace I kept.

Running for me isn’t just another part of being fit, it gave me clarity with my life, time to step away from everything except myself. It allowed me to set my own goals. Goals that had nothing whatsoever to do with anyone else, and I find this important especially when you are in a solid relationship and you’ve recently moved to a new city like I have, it could become very easy for me to solely depend on my relationship for fulfillment. I don’t think it takes a genius to see that that could be extremely unhealthy. So setting my marathon goals was something that I felt defined me. Something that was ‘mine’. I do feel like this has been taking away in one big blow at the moment.

All it seems that I can really do now is hope, stay healthy and committed to getting better. I have just started my new job and I am loving it so, so much. The people, the office itself, the location, what we do – everything feels so right and having been there a week I’ve already been pulled aside by my manager and been given some great news and feedback which made me incredibly happy. Another of my bosses sat down with me and discussed career plans and I really believe I could find a mentor in this particular person which has given me something further to work towards… So in begging for a silver lining, in needing something to distract my focus – I’m going to take work as that particular filler and try my best to focus on career goals in the meantime.

It would be extremely nice to be able to have it all – but they say you can’t, probably for a good reason. They say you have a great man, a great career and a great house but rarely all at once – I guess whoever ‘they’ are ha decided to smite me and taken away my health.

So in the meantime my posts will likely focus on things other than running and fitness as it will honestly hurt me quite a bit to read about them let alone focus writing about them… Please except this post merely as an explanation and not as a massive sook fest. Also, I honestly hope to post a bit more but settling into work routine again after the break it has really taken a toll on my personal time so my apologies for being absent this week.

How is everyone having just arrived back from work? I am quite used to waking at 5am and getting alot done in the mornings so my next post will be about time management, if you have any tips – feel free to post them in a comment reply and I’ll include the best ones along with blog links in the post. 🙂

 

To leave you with something a hell of a lot more cheerful, I was recently awared a Stylish Blogger Award by the lovely Gillian who is the author of one of my favourite Sydney blogs, http://gillpill.tumblr.com/

The idea is that you also nominate 7 people for this award and list 7 facts about yourself- so first things first, my nominations would go to:

1. Gill Pill – I know she nominated me, but dammit I want to nominate her back. I love her blog and she’s as addicted to over-consumption of cosmetics in pretty packaging as I am.

2. Me Vs The Bulge – Amanda keeps one of the best blogs as far as fitness/weight loss/all round health tips goes, and she is quite similar to me so I always feel like she either took the words right out of my mouth or is a step ahead of me with trialing new products.

3. This Is Glamorous – I have no idea who does this blog to be fair, but isn’t it aaaaamazing?!?

4. Fit Definition – Dammit, upon clicking my homepage link to Liz’s blog I see I’ve not only missed a couple of great posts she has recently put up (work schedule takes away all the fun in my life, reading blogs is sadly such a pleasurable past time) but I’ve also been nominated by her for one of these awards. Now I feel like a massive jerk for having missed this and also I feel quite satisfied with myself for having her in my list anyways. Her blog entries always have me drawn in from start to finish.

5. Run, Eat, Repeat – Monica runs and eats and blogs. I’m pretty sure that’s not all she does but how she has time for anything else is beyond me, her posts are pretty much daily and always full of photos. Great read.

6. Oh She Glows – Angela’s story is as interesting as her blog. Most of her recipes are vegan, which I’m not – but it has opened my eyes to great alternatives and new ingredients for my cooking. Plus quite alot of my friends are vegan and I love passing on her recpies.

7. Frou Frou Fashionista – The ladies at Faire Frou Frou started following me quite some time ago on Twitter and I’ve been addicted to this blog ever since. It’s lust worthy and their store is one of the most beautiful places I’ve ever seen. You need to save up and spend up here.

 

Now for seven little tidbits about me:

 

1. I always have a TV series on the go. I’m addicted. I don’t have the patience to sit through movies and I feel like they are generally quite disappointing. So thanks to Sidereel.com I’m pretty much always watching something. Currently it is Grey’s Anatomy and An Idiot Abroad.

2. I never thought I’d be the marrying type. In fact I used to believe there was nothing worse or less suited to me than getting married.

3. I have a long term love affair with London. Everything about that city tugs on my heartstrings on a regular basis.

4. I used to be one of the messiest people that I’ve ever met, my house was shambles. Now I’m meticulously clean and get irritated and all bothered by mess or clutter in my life.

5. I tried my first macchiato on Wednesday and am now a firm believer that mornings would be quite shite without them.

6. I hide purchases from time to time now that I live with the boy. I don’t think it’s important that he knows if I bought a new pair of Stella McCartney pants when I have been sooking about money… they were cute and they fit like a glove.

7. I cannot stand and never ever have chipped nail polish. I’m looking at you Liz, hahaha. ❤