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2011 for me was a year of epic proportions. Not in the usual sense; I’m so used to travelling and moving around but for the entire 2011 I stayed put.

I got engaged, got used to live in Sydney, have clocked a year off at my new job, I finished my certification in Personal Training/Exercise Science and I didn’t travel (sadly, except to Melbourne for visits home).

It’s been a glorious year of learning new things about myself. I’ve come to learn that I like to runaway frequently and that loving someone means that I need to learn to love one city and not be such a fucking gypsy, but that calm has aloud me to complete other tasks like my qualification and my year at my new job. And let’s not forget that I trained like a fucking boss. I increased my muscle mass significantly, decreased my fat mass – but most importantly I went from barely being able to run longer than 20 minutes without actually dying; to being able to do almost anything. To lift heavier weights than alot of men in the gyms, to being able to sprint up stairs… I took on the challenges and literally smashed them to smithereens.

With 2012 now already having begun (and my general hate on for ‘resolutions’) I’m back in the swing of things as per usual but wanted to document to myself, and whoever listens to my rants these days – the year past and the year to come – and all the goals I have for the next twelve months.

  • Being the gypsy that I am I’m finding it hard being in a tiny apartment, so my first and my most important goal is to find a house to share with S. I want a bathtub again, timber floorboards, a yard. More space to frollick and fuck it; a spare bedroom that can easily double as my giant closet.
  • 2012 calls for financial organisation in order to complete my goals so getting an accountant and making leeway with my payments is top priority for this kid *that’s where you imagine me sat here with my two thumbs pointed at myself*
  • I realised in 2011 I was training as if I wanted to compete in bodybuilding competitions. In actual fact, I don’t. I have zero interest in getting up on stage and whilst I would like to do some photographic work in the future I realised that fuck it, life is too short to place such high pressures on myself and my body expectations. I need to eat clean and train hard but I do not neccessarily need to smash 8 sessions a week and eat lean meat and broccoli only when I have not got these goals.
    If you are achieving these goals; more power to you, but without these goals as your target acting this way is merely stressful to your mind and body and restricts you from living your life. I miss social drinking and late nights and enjoying myself at a restaurant from time to time and being a food nazi and eating for comp prep is so pointless and creates a negative energy if you don’t have a goal in mind. My friend Amanda at MeVsTheBulge is currently in comp prep and I am utterly inspired by her, but she has goals and knows when to push harder and she also knows there will be a certain date in which she can relax – I did not have this and was only creating pressure I could not live up to day in day out.
    This doesn’t excuse me not training like a boss; because I fucking will. And it doesn’t mean I’m going to start eating takeaway or greasy shit; I won’t… It just means I need to stop endlessly counting calories in vs out and being so hard on myself for no real goal or reason. I look great in my clothes and I look great naked, I may not have a six pack but at the end of the day, who the fuck cares? I’m healthy and fit and I need to keep this mindset.
  • I also am more than aware that it’s hard on my partner to watch me constantly train and restrict myself and he is so supportive of everything I do which only makes me want to find happiness in that headspace more so.
    I want to start going out more. I need to socialise. I think this has been restricted because of the above reasons but this needs to change this year as I also need an excuse for my next goal:
  • Update my wardrobe. It’s my goal in 2012 to own more high heels, party dresses and lacy lingerie. The first and last I can get away with in the bedroom but the party dresses call for socialising.
  • Visit home more often. I miss my girlfriends and my brofriends, haha-brofriends. Whattaword.
  • Save $$$ for our trip back to my real home (LONDON!) and a visit around Europe.
  • Sing. I’ve been asked recently to send someone who is ridiculously talented a demo and as fucking scared as I am, I enjoy singing so working on my confidence and getting something out there – even if it’s shithouse, is my personal challenge. Confidence is key. I WILL get lessons.
  • Training… Work on my website and start training people; extend the joy of fitness to others. Tacky/corny as it sounds, fitness changed my life and I want to help other people get it together as well.


Well that’s it for me, for now, and let’s face it – I did shorten that up a fucking lot.

Here’s some of my random photos and memories of 2011 to close with, there not in order and most of them include food… But I hope you enjoy, I know I will enjoy looking back on them come next year…



Brace yourself – this is going to be a long entry. However I’ve seen countless twitter updates and blog entries about the bathroom scales and their lack of honesty or more accurately, just how useless they are in determining fat loss and I’ve been meaning to put together a piece for quite some time now, unfortunately for those ADHD sufferers – it’s not something I feel like I can brush over quickly…

Let me paint you a picture…

You’ve been training your tush off, yet according to your scales your tush doesn’t seem to be actually going anywhere. Say, you’re down to your last five kilos of fat loss to go and you hop on the scales one idle morning knowing in your heart of hearts that you’ve trained so hard and eaten the cleanest of foods but wait, WHAT THE FUCK?! You’ve gained weight?! How is that even possible? Why did this happen?  “How am I going to get through the day without actually losing my marbles”, you think.

And why wouldn’t that be your thought process; it’s depressing for even the strongest of us. You eat the right foods when everyone else is eating carb loaded processed garbage. When others go straight home after work to park their ass in front of their glorious 45inch plasmas and the newest episode of Gossip Girl, you head to the gym and train till you feel like you might collapse never finding out what actually happened with Blair and Chuck. On the weekends instead of going out drinking from Friday through to Sunday, like you used to do before your healthy conscience kicked your ass, you keep to the plan and you head back into that gym. In fact, you’re in there enough that your own family sees you less than the staff at your gym does.

So what in god’s name is going on with your body, huh? Better yet, what on earth is going on with your head? All these mind games can’t be doing you any favours; in fact they are almost enough to make you want to give up all together and go back to your old boozehound ways (Hello Friday night drinks and Saturday 3am kebabs). I mean, why not? You’ve put so much work into this and you seem to be getting nowhere fast. What’s the point?

Well, before you go to the nearest 7-11 and induce death by chocolate; ditch your fucking scales. Throw them from the greatest height and DO NOT LOOK BACK. Your scales are useless on your quest to transform and they are holding you back mentally in such a ridiculous manner that it likely will have a lovely side effect of holding you back physically too (We’re all guilty of throwing in the towel a little and having things to eat we know we shouldn’t or skipping training sessions if we just feel as though we’re not getting anywhere).

But don’t worry; you’re not alone in this – I am speaking from great personal experience here… The scales have been my best friend and worst enemy for many years; some times they are the same thing at once. I remember days when I used to weigh myself two or three times a day, and beat myself up emotionally when I was a kilo or two heavier at night than I was in the morning; even though in reality that would be exactly what would happen to anyone over the course of a day.

This is not a normal habit. This is something I was guilty of in the very worst of my days and it’s not healthy. We are not on a quest to be skinny; we are on a quest to be fit and healthy. If you think that playing mind games between yourself and the scales is a good idea, you couldn’t be more wrong. What’s the point in putting so much effort into bettering yourself only to be so demotivational?.

So why should you ditch the scales? Other than the reasons I’ve given you so far…Well we all KNOW muscle weighs more than fat. We also know that training in the gym is not going to get you to lose muscle, so the more you train – the more muscle you gain, now let’s put two and two together and that would explain a lack of decrease in your scale numbers. But for some of us that logic just isn’t enough to break a habit we’ve probably had since the day we learnt what the word calorie meant.

Let me tell you a personal story to prove a point…

I’d been saying to myself all year that I want to hit under the 60kg mark. If I didn’t get there; I was writing myself off as a failure. I started the year at about 67kgs and recently I actually got down to 60.5kg.  Exciting, right? ALMOST THERE. I was overjoyed. I loved what I saw when I looked in the mirror, everything fit better, everything suited me – I was smiling constantly. Until my next weekly weigh in (yes, I had enforced a once a week and no more rule) where I expected to be under the 60kg mark, but instead it clocked me in at 63.5kgs. You can imagine the fury, in fact I think you could almost see the steam coming out my ears and my eyes turning red the moment I stepped off the scales. I cried. I literally took one look in the mirror and decided that the body I saw was a totally different one to two or three minutes prior. I was now disgusting and embarrassed to leave the house. In my eyes I couldn’t see the difference between 63.5kgs and 105kgs. How could I be so massive suddenly? I put on the loosest clothing imaginable and headed into work deciding that I wouldn’t take these head games any longer. I just couldn’t continue to be so reckless and allow my thoughts to be dictated by a number.

Jump back three months prior to this; I had had a Dexa Scan… I’d read about them online and I was interested in a method that would accurately gauge my weight loss as I deep down never really trusted those nasty scales (yes, I’ve always been aware they are stupid – yet for some reason have always aloud them to dictate my moods and self confidence). For those of you that aren’t aware, a Dexa scan is an x-ray which determines exactly what your body is made up of, it will show you how much of your body is comprised of bones, what your bone density is like, how much is of you is made of muscle and how much is (insert cringe) fat. But more than that, it takes into account water retention; it shows your symmetry (ever wondered which leg is bigger than the other or if your right arm has more muscle than your left? Wonder no more). I went into see Dr Jarrod Meerkin at Measure Up in Sydney where he politely asked me to jump up on this very modern looking bench which would scan over my body as I lay still and a few minutes later gave me a detailed description of what was actually going on. Easy. He would even give me an idea of how many calories I should consume a day and what my macronutrients should be according to my goals.

So when three months later I had my princess moment with the scales I decided enough was enough; if I was gaining fat I needed to know and I needed to change whatever it was that wasn’t working.

Luckily for my sanity, Jarrad had availability that day at lunch for a follow up scan, I held my breath, crossed my fingers and pray to God, Allah and Buddah that there was something wrong with my scales and my efforts had actually resulted in a loss not a gain.

What I found out that day was that my weight had in fact gone up, KILL ME NOW, right? No. My weight had gone up but my body fat had decreased by several kilos and a total of 4%. The increase in weight was caused by a significant increase in muscle mass (well, what do you know? All that weight training and I’d gotten bigger muscles – one would think I could’ve put that together on my own).

Not only that but my body had evened out and become completely symmetrical when before I was holding a lot more fat on the right leg and arm.

So essentially what I had been doing was working, and working really well. My goals were to increase muscle mass and decrease fat, which I had done and very successfully over the course of 12 weeks. Not only that but as I had increased muscle, my body was burning a greater number of calories daily all on it’s own (this is why you want to weight train ladies; muscle BURNS fat. It’s like the Rock/Paper/Scissors of body sculpting).

At the end of the day we need to realize that the number on your scales is not going to really indicate what is going on with your body at all. If you’re like me and you have 5kgs or so left of fat to lose then you aren’t really even going to see these numbers shift at all; you might spend months training weights and cardio and stay at the same weight and yet completely decrease your body fat percentage and your actual shape will change all together.

It comes down to remembering that your health and peace of mind is more important than your body fat percentage too though. More importantly than your quest for weight loss is your health, and that includes the way you perceive yourself in the mirror and inside your mind. What my experience taught me is that patience is a virtue and whilst I have very little patience, I need to work on developing that as at this point in my journey, things take a long time. I will likely not notice results in the mirror that I look at EVERY day and the way I feel, be it grumpy or elated, will always dictate the reflection that I see staring back at me.

So let’s all make a pact now to get rid of those bathroom scales because they lie more than your ex-boyfriend. And let’s spend time enforcing positive affirmations and working on body confidence. Make your goals about training rather than about your body, aim to achieve a faster time in your running, or a greater weight lifted… and let go of your weight loss nonsense but remember to eat clean and train hard and rest in the faith that you are doing ALL that you can; because when push comes to shove, that’s exactly all you can do. Be your best and be patient and in three months time, then look at your results. They might surprise you.


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So we all know I love to train. Train, train, train, eat and sleep. That’s pretty much the epitome of happiness right there for me.

But why do I train so hard? Awwh, man don’t ask big questions… 😉   I don’t exactly know. At first I enjoyed getting in shape, then it became about being able to mould my body and the science behind fitness and nutrition being able to totally change your shape. Now I think one day, maybe, I’d like to do some fitness modelling – No, I don’t mean that I would like to be some hot shot model, I just mean I’d love to be comfortable enough with my own body and proud of my accomplishments through training so hard that I want to show it off.  So for now that’s the goal. I’d like to push myself to my limits and train like an actual boss always overloading and progressing further to see where this takes me but I’d really like to do some kind of amateur photo shoot stuff in about three to six months.

I’ve got a long way to go to get to where it is I want to be. But where was I before? Well that’s the interesting part.

I used to weigh 85kgs. Lovely and fit. *Rolls eyes* I used to live off junk food, Maccas and KFC twice a day would not be out of the question. Not to mention numerous lovely sugary and salty (I was not exactly prejudice) snacks in between meals. I smoked like a chimney from the age 13 to December last year, that’s 13 years in total. I used to drink tequila like it was going out of fashion (I’m not kidding, binge drinking was my Tuesday/Thursday/Friday and Saturday night favourite to-do’s) and I wasn’t exactly above abusing illicit substances.

It’s been a couple of years now since I’ve lost majority of my weight, I was 70kgs at some point toward the end of 2010 and that’s when I really started my training. I didn’t lose all my weight from training like a gym beast, I wish I could say that I did but the amount of yo-yo dieting, diet pills and stupid fucking choices I have made to shift that weight only made me more determined these days and more understanding so when I do start Personal Training. I figure there will be hardly anything I don’t understand when it comes to why people are the way they are and the lengths people go to to shift weight. I’m also now keenly aware of how much better life in general can be with fitness and nutrition being a big part of your day to day life. I even advocate fitness over anti-depressants. Having suffered a ridiculous strain from depression that medicine never did one 1000th of what working out can do for your mind, body and soul.

After a couple of months of running consistently every morning (I’m not even kidding when I say I had to start with C25k app to even get running in the first place) I then suffered an intense knee cartilage injury that I wrote about earlier this year on here… For quite some time I couldn’t walk properly, let alone train and my doctors performed ultrasounds and x-rays and told me it might be appropriate to prepare myself for the reality of not training anymore. That was January this year. At that point I was about ready to give the fuck up. It was all so hard. It wasn’t until about mid-March that I was able to make the move back into training and so realistically I’ve only been doing this since then. My progression feels so slow but looking back on how far I’ve actually come in the space of about eight months, I have to really pat myself on the back.

I had a Dexa scan when I started to get really serious about training three months ago and have since dropped 4% body fat percentage, dropped kilos of fat mass and I’m building a great base of muscle mass. I am pretty proud of how quickly it’s coming along, though now I’m really wanting to lean out and further drop my body fat. That’s the goal.

So, without further adieu; here’s an old photo of me a couple of years back with my Dad over the holidays, it’s not the best quality photo and probably doesn’t emphasise just how big I was – but I’ve made damn sure there aren’t many photos of me at this size floating around, this one happened to have slipped in amongst some family photos my grandma was busted showing my fiancée (Yes, thanks heaps Grandma)….

And here are some current pictures of myself, as I’ve noticed that I frequently post about my progress or my fitness goals without actually holding myself accountable or even posting pictures of myself for you (whoever you are) to see…

Hopefully over the next few months I can get a little closer to this amazingness, which is my goal body…

I know that this is barely brushing the surface of my journey with fitness and why I do this stuff and what I want to do in the future but I hope it helps you to understand me better and possibly inspire you to push yourself and more than anything I hope being open about this inspires me to push myself even harder than before…

You just do what you can.

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Last time I checked in I spoke about my extreme training week; you can see the details here… In short I basically challenged myself to attempt to preform 8 training sessions in a week.

Why? Let’s face it, I love to eat. I don’t love to diet (I hate this word more than you can possibly imagine – but more on that later) or restrict myself, don’t get me wrong I eat clean and love to do so… I’m always trying to find new ways to prepare healthier dishes, but at the end of the day if it means the difference between having dinner with a little sweet potato, or a light creamy sauce (extra kilojoules) I’d much prefer to do that than eat a bland combination of protein and vegetables with no flavour – I’d rather just work out harder than tell myself I’m not aloud to have certain things.

It’s a lifestyle choice, you can choose to constantly restrict yourself to lose the weight but you’re also setting yourself up for failure. Or for a competition body; and that sort of thing comes with knowing more about your body than most people ever discover in a lifetime so that really isn’t what I’m talking about. Women that compete are so in tune with their figures and diets and training schedules that it isn’t about weight loss so much as it is an art form – what I’m talking about is day to day loss.

My extreme week was hard, by Friday I wasn’t sure I would get through it – I thought I’d torn my rotator cuff – turned out it was more of a simple injury *thank fuck* but it meant I had to switch my rest days over, one day off and a lot of painkillers later and I was through the 8 sessions.

In the clear.

And what came from this was something more appealing than I could’ve ever expected. The week went so quick, and I’ve never been so exhausted but it was rewarding on many levels.

 I was mentally clearer than ever, happier, I pushed myself harder than ever in my training sessions – even though I did twice as much, session wise, I also did twice as much, effort wise.

Not to get TMI on you guys, but it was even rewarding in the bedroom.

Funnily enough; instead of let myself rest after getting through it I’ve decided to do it all over again, harder this time. More intense sessions than before.

The pay off was well worth it- I’m currently at the lowest weight I’ve been in years and the definition in my body has changed entirely over the past week, muscles I didn’t know existed are making appearances. There is even a little two pack appearing in my abdominal area (YOU WILL BE A SIX PACK BY SUMMER! In the meantime though I’m enjoy the fact I have my own personal tupac, geddddit!? Ohhhh, I kill me).

Cannot wait to see my results in a months time. I can only hope you guys are getting as much out of your training as I am and if not; maybe it’s time you ask yourself why you’re flatlining and you shake it up?

My advice though, for anyone else trying to get through a heavy week of training like I did is to fully commit to it with planning – both nutrition and exercise, write your schedule and know  your macro nutrient needs. I would’ve died if I didn’t have the amount of protein I was getting last week. And without proper planning it can be hard to ensure you get your daily needs especially when training at a high intensity.

I’m going to start posting more on this site, I’m obsessed with taking photos of my meals and I want to start to share that stuff with you guys too.

Til next time, train hard, play hard…


Image Source: Courtesy of

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If you follow me on Twitter, and let’s face it – you probably should 😉 then you may have noticed my status updates about returning to my hometown. This update is probably going to bore the life out of anyone it doesn’t feature but I’ll try to keep it as interesting as possible. I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t mostly updating this for my own pleasure and terrible memory purposes (I would like to recall this trip for a long time but have the memory of a goldfish).

Granted it is only a one hour flight from where I live now I’ve been irrefutably lazy about going home and seeing everyone but in a great twist of fate it turned out to be one of the best things I’d never planned. Seeing everyone after six months of being absent was an absolute blast. I drank, I ate, I did not exercise – I was merry. Mind you I completely missed being so stellar with my gym and eating; it was really nice to unwind for the first time in months and I have promised myself not to dwell on it but just to get back on the healthy bandwagon.

I got home Thursday and spent several hours with my favourite person in Melbourne, my hairdresser. Okay, so perhaps that’s an overstatement but he’s THAT good at what he does. If you have short hair and want gorgeous long thick locks, then look him up (Bruno – dare2hair in Carlton, tiny little place, but magic worker I swear to god… I’ve been a regular for about 3 years and he’s just such a lovely, talented hairdresser – why else would I rush back here?).

My best friend Danni joined me at the salon and filled me in on absolutely everything that I needed to know or had missed in the past six months, it was gossip central – I absolutely loved it. Then we ventured on over to my other best friend Bec’s house (we are like the three amigos). Bec has recently purchased her own to-die-for big house and moved in with her two pups and boyfriend (whom I adore and drops the C bomb more often than I do – go figure). We spent Thursday night drinking Strawberry Lime cider, eating Chicken Cacciatore (Beau is an insane chef and I am awaiting the next visit with incredible anticipation so I can make him cook again!) and watching House Bunny (much to Beau’s disappointment) and had an early bed time.

Friday was filled with amazing moments, Danni arrived for breakfast and then we headed into the city for SHOPPING, I got to finally check out the new Myer establishment which is the most exciting thing seeing as though Myer in Melbourne has truly looked like Dimmeys for the past 5 years. Then we met up with one of my favourites, Mark, whilst he was on his lunch break. Then Daniel for English Breakfast teas, before he started work. Then bumped into Brenton at Starbucks – are you getting the gist of things??? I SAW ALOT OF PEOPLE I KNOW IN A VERY SHORT PERIOD OF TIME!. We rushed down to see my brother at his work making us incredibly late for my night of cocktails and showing off my engagement ring to everyone I fucking adore who came out.

We started out at Kitten Club where I was handed many different cocktails by most people in attendance (mixing drinks does not bode well with someone who has barely touched a drop in months), then continued over to Fashion Keyboards just to say hello to a couple of my friends that are resident djs there – and then over to Miss Libertines where I managed to talk us out of a $20 cover charge – thank you gift of the gab (AND NOT IN THE FILTHY WAY). To list all the people that I saw on the Friday night would take up a page and bore the shit out of my readers but needless to say it involved my fucking favourite human beings, some people I’ve known for years and years and never feel like I’ve been away from. I am truly blessed to have the friends that I do and those that came out made my little heart skip beats. I cannot e-drool enough over how incredible it was to see them.

Then Saturday I had to return to my hairdressers for a few finishing touches on my hair – I tell you right now, this was an incredible effort… To say I was the most hungover I’ve ever been in my entire life might be an overstatement – but I wouldn’t be far off. If I told you I didn’t make Danni stop on the side of the road so that I could attempt to expel the acid reflux brewing inside my alcohol filled tummy I’d be a liar. If I told you I didn’t also excuse myself to the bathroom at my hairdressers and the shopping centre afterwards, I’d be a bigger liar.

I managed to make it through the hairdressers, and a coconut water and roast chicken wrap from Subway saved my soul and allowed me to pull through one last shopping trip, where insane purchases were made and my credit card wept. A chai latte was sipped whilst we pondered over what to do on the Saturday night; after such a hectic couple of days (especially seeing as though Saturday was a mission worthy of being dubbed ‘The Hangover III’) we decided to make way over to JB HIFI and pick up a copy of NBA Jam, annihilate the vegetable section at Coles and cook up roast vegetables worthy of fixing any hungover little trooper whilst we parked our asses on the couch at Bec & Beau’s house, attempting to refuse the half whiskey half diet coke drinks that Beau would have liked us to ingest.

Come Sunday morning I was sad to say goodbye to Bec, Danni and Beau but really excited to see my family. My brother picked me up and we headed on out to St Kilda for coffee and a spinach quiche whilst we made the drive home to the Peninsula. Dad had invited my uncle and Grandma over for lunch and they had whipped up a glorious feast. My step mum has taken a liking to Jamie Oliver (I believe she even told my Dad he was the only other British man she’d leave him for, I don’t know if that means she’s allowed to leave him for men of other nationalities or if she just fancies poms but either way I’m glad his cooking skills have rubbed off on her). We ate a delicious roast including the most amazing vegetables (if you don’t know – I’m currently on a vegetable frenzy and so anything involving stuff I haven’t tried or new variations of vegetables makes me salivate). There was roast pumpkin, roast sweet potato, carrots, beans, broccoli, cauliflower and my new favourite (have I said favourite enough this post?) MASHED PARNSIP. OMFG. My Grandma has out done herself with this one, I imagine it’s incredibly bad for you because it’s cream and milk and butter, but the god’s have whispered this recipe to her I’m certain of it.

Then just when I thought I couldn’t eat another bite, out comes the Banoffee Pie. Which thankfully I wasn’t a fan of (don’t get me wrong, everyone else hoovered it down, but I’m not a big sweets fan – I kept going back and sticking my finger in the parsnip mash so I suppose the calories leveled out) but I did keep pinching the slices of banana out of the pie and ruining it for everyone else (those things are like $3 each – can’t justify letting them go to waste and I do love me some potassium.

Bellies full, we food coma’d on the couch watching Russell Brand’s Scandalous until my Dad told us to turn off the foul mouthed British man with weird hair and we decided to pack it in and head to Mumma’s house where the more foul mouthed the television, the better. I cuddled up on the couch with my Mumma whilst we called Sean, who I think she wished was there more than me, and got ready for dinner.

Now, let me explain something to you – I realistically at this point, could have never eaten another bite and it still would have been too much food – but my Mum is a chef, and an incredible one at that. Not only is she a chef but she has the same taste buds as me, so there was chili in everything and everything was to my liking – I couldn’t NOT eat. She’d put on a pasta feast! We food coma’d again and I ran a spa bath and headed to bed. In the morning I cooked breakfast for the family; a delicious omelette with loads of fresh vegetables. Mum was impressed which made me feel quite the little MasterChef indeed *wink*.

The trip was far too short, especially the time I got to spend with my parents; but the space between this and the next one will not be quite so long and next time I will be dragging my gorgeous fiance down to get to know everyone better. It wasn’t the same without him in tow. Coming home has been so lovely though.

All in all my trip to Melbourne was one of the best holidays I’ve ever had… Now, can anyone guess how much I’m not looking forward to returning to work and the regular day to day grind of real life???


2010 is almost over. It’s been another amazing year for me. In fact I’ve been really blessed and have had an incredible run the last three years.

I’m hoping it’s not a hat trick sort of situation and that this luck (I honestly attribute it to hard work) continues to flow steadily into 2011.

Looking back on the year in a style similar to the sports highlight package at the end of the news, my timeline would run like this:

*Summer was the birth of my love for electro music. I spent my time at every festival imaginable, seeing as many gigs as possible. I also purchased my dj gear and spent majority of my time learning to dj or in the gym.

*After a couple of months I landed some amazing sets. I had an absolute blast and supported some of my favourite djs.

*The lease ended on my apartment in Melbourne city – I had been there two years and loved that place to death. Living alone in the city was pure bliss. I went shopping almost daily and the ability to basically roll home from nights out was ever so convenient. I’ve had some of the greatest times in that apartment but it was time to move on and so I packed up and put all my belongings in storage and became a citizen of my suitcase.

*London was the first stop. I met my brother at Liverpool Street station and we checked into our hotel and we spent a week exploring the city and partying. Going to crazy gigs; including one party in an abandoned car park in London which was probably one of the greatest things I’ve ever seen. I spent time with two of my best friends in my favourite city. Living in a spare bedroom of  my favourite Turkish resident of Islington. My heart was stuck with London but something kept telling me I had to move on…

*Japan. Finally arrived in Tokyo not long after and spent time there and Osaka. I wasn’t overly fond of Japan and decided that I needed to go back to Melbourne for a while to make a decision on where I would live.

*Living in a hotel in Melbourne for almost 2 months was absolutely insane. I had the greatest time of my life, and having a pool and gym at the end of your hall is convenience at it’s best.

*Moved to Yarraville – but felt as though my heart was still not with Melbourne. I wasn’t settled and I wanted so badly to get out and continue to move around.

*Sydney – I flew back and forth from Melbourne to Sydney so many times this year that I actually lost count.

*Finally made the decision to move to Sydney. To live with my best friend and soulmate and it was clearly the best decision I have ever made as we’re now…

*Engaged. I couldn’t picture this ever being something that I would have said yes to or even considered doing not that long ago. But I think that when something feels right – you just have to go with your heart and for the first time since London I had felt clarity and settled. I know without a shadow of doubt that spending the rest of my life with him is what I want. I’ve never felt this way before. I’ve never been quite so happy.

*Oooh, and I quit smoking. Which is massive for me because if you know me I seem naked without a cigarette. I’ve been smoking since back in highschool days and it had hit double digits in years since I started so quitting was a huge step.

*Studying. I’m studying to become a Personal Trainer. After seeing the transformation in my life this past year I’ve noticed just how much being fit has made an impact on my happiness. I don’t know if I’ll ever work full time as a trainer but it’s definitely something I want to know more about and I want to work part time within the industry.


My goals for next year are to focus on my career, I start my new job early January and I want more than anything to be successful at it and to love it. I want to focus on my health and fitness, I plan to complete a half and full marathon in 2011. I also want to travel again, I can barely keep my feet on the ground for a whole year. And of course, to focus on my relationship… I don’t think there will be a wedding in 2011 – I have a hard enough time finding a dress to wear to Field Day – let alone something to wear for what I’m told is the most important day of my life; but it’s important to me that I make sure we stay this happy together forever. Sappy, I know. I’m almost mortified I even wrote that on a public forum.

So, tell me… what are your goals for 2011 – and what are your proudest achievements for 2010???


Running The Tan in Melbourne

Being an idiot, in Japan.

My DJ setup. So OCD.

My old apartment in Melbourne.

One of the first shows I played at.

My old gym in Melbourne.

On my way to Sydney to see the boy I adore.

Future in a fortune cookie. From one of our dates.


Please excuse the lack of posts lately. I have been enjoying a little ‘me’ time..

S (the boy) has flown over to Thailand with his best friend for two weeks of beer, junk food and mayhem (as boys do) and so I’ve been at home by myself for a little bit and ‘finding my footing’; albeit not realistically because I still am not aloud to run yet, thank you peroneal tendonitis.

This has been the first time I’ve been alone in our house since we moved in, in fact we haven’t spent a night apart so my first thoughts were geared towards how I would act when he was not around. I have a really great support system as far as working out and eating well goes when it comes to our relationship. S is incredibly supportive of me getting up at 5am to go running most mornings (by supportive I mean, he stays in bed)… or if there’s an area in Sydney I’ve always wanted to run, he’ll drop me off there so I can run home if it’s too far to go both ways. I think sometimes though that I am more productive because he’s around – I can’t very well allow myself to be that girlfriend that slobs around, whinging questions like “does my ass look fat in this?” with one hand on a spoon and the other on a tub of ice cream and wonder how the f*ck it happened in the first place… I feel almost like I have to be on my best behaviour with both my diet and my workout routines so then when I choose to have a bit of a body conscious meltdown it’s justified. So when he left for holidays I found myself wondering if I would keep up with my heavy training program or if I would just sit at home watching Grey’s Anatomy and constantly checking my phone for text messages from overseas, or if I would actually go to the gym – even though the only person I had to prove anything to was myself.

What I’ve learnt from his absence is that being healthy is a state of mind. If I’ve done anything in this time by myself I’ve increased my training goals, I have stayed stricter with my healthy eating – trying new recipes and I’m feeling better for it. I’ve watched a lot of Grey’s Anatomy too but you get the picture.

I know that this has all happened because my desire to be healthy outweighs all my primal urges to just do nothing. Don’t get me wrong, there were plenty of years when my laziness was palpable, I wouldn’t do anything remotely productive unless absolutely necessary… but now I find that being healthier and maintaining a clean eating regime and a great training schedule has me making better life choices, even when no one else is looking. I sleep better, I snack less, I drink less, I don’t smoke anymore, I put in a multitude more effort in other areas of my life like career or relationships. I also notice looking back that when I was making those lazier choices I was also desiring to be model skinny. I don’t desire that at all anymore, I notice myself finding inspiration in athletes rather than celebrities. I guess what it all comes down to is that being healthy has completely changed my life in every aspect, especially my happiness within myself and my surroundings and relationships. So going to the gym or cleaning up your diet isn’t just about having a body that you think looks good in your clothing and it certainly isn’t about being skinny… If you’re considering cleaning up your lifestyle for the new year -eating better and getting into the gym- I urge you to make those changes for yourself, and when you do I dare you not to love it.

Does anyone else agree? Have you noticed massive life changes since you got onto the health wagon?